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Tuesday, January 29, 2013
Just be yourself! Except at work, or out in public anywhere that may have you opening your mouth. Once again, something I said in complete innocence (really!) was misinterpreted by someone who can cause quite an upheaval in my life. An employer, in other words. I accept that the problem is mine -- that despite a few similar missteps in the past, I still manage to drop a clanger here and there. The problem with thinking before speaking is that it's the same old brain doing the damn thinking. I've come to terms with being quite dim at times, despite my best intentions, but I suppose it's unrealistic to expect others to accept my flaws readily.
What it does, each time it happens to me, is make me more forgiving of my dear old Dad, Mad Melvin. For a smart man, Dad drops the most amazing bombs at times, precisely because what he says sounded good to him, and therefore he couldn't see any reason not to say it. Meanwhile, horror, shock, outrage, etc., among the listeners.
Self-acceptance: I accept that I am an occasional bonehead. I accept that I may just have to get used to apologizing profusely for stuff that I can't believe has upset another person, especially someone whom I thought knew me better than that -- i.e., knew that I wouldn't intentionally give offence without very good reason. But even the oldest friends are still prone to human frailties, and everyone has sore spots. Which, apparently, I can tapdance upon without knowing. DAMN.